Sunday, March 7, 2010

When my baby smiles at me I go to Rio...

When Tegan and Charlotte smile at eachother, we go to Rio!!! And we can tell you that our experience of Rio was very different from the glitzy images of sunshine and glamour you may have in your minds. For starters it was drizzling!! We wandered the shores of Ipanema beach, staring at the clouded Horizon. There was a little moment of sunlight in the morning and we lapped it up. Lazing on the sand, reading, frolicking in the atlantic ocean and trying to take pictures of people in filty g-bangers!! But in the arvo the rain started again!!!

After 2 days in Ipanema we packed our bags and moved to Lapa (the dirrty, underground, bohemian part of the city). During our stay in Brazil we´d had the warnings of BEM PERIGOSO (very dangerous) so many times, with nothing bad occuring, that we no longer really took them seriously. However, Lapa the trickster, really was BEM PERIGOSO!!!!!!

We trundle off the bus in Lapa, swinging our bags and begin our hunt for the hostel Samba. This man approaches us and asks us if we need directions. We tell him we´ll be fine. But he snatches the map out of Tegan´s hand and directs us to follow. He then asks someone where the hostel is. This time, we tell him again, we can find it ourselves. But he takes tegan´s ukelele and says its fine. So we arrive at the hostel, pretty much exactly in front of where we were standing and we go in to get a dorm. When old mate comes in and demands 20 Reais. We tell him no way. But he continues pestering us and the hostel people have to tell him to leave. Tegan and I go upstairs and wait 2 hours until we dare go out again, in case he is still waiting for us. The lady at the front desk tells us that they had to get the police to remove him, because he kept pestering them!!!! What a psycho!!!!

So with the psycho removed, we walk one block from the hostel and get some yummy dinner. Upon walking back, we see this gang of approx 14 children approaching us (we are literally 20m from our hostel at this stage). They surround us and demand some money. We tell them no. Then they start snatching at Tegan´s bag. Her first thought is ´there´s nothing in here really but a book and a water bottle´. But then she thinks ´wait i´m really enjoying this book´. And so she puts up a swell fight, scratching at the kids, even gathering skin under her nails. Meanwhile, a smaller group have started to move in on me, one grabs at my belt and i push him back, but he comes back for another swipe. Just when the battle is looking hopeless, a gun shot goes off. The kids start scrambling and this undercover cop appears!!!! Talk about luck!!

So with a psycho and a gang of kids after us, HOSTEL ARREST begins!!! Lucky the hostel are giving out a massive jug of free Caiparinhas (strong alcoholic beverage). After downing a few we sit on the street in the doorway of our hostel with all the jewellery makers and make friends with these two Columbians (stay tuned for more stories involving them).

Night 2 in Lapa, manages to be just as eventful. We meet this Austrian girl and have a few Caiparinhas with her. She has all these crazy tattoos and even shows us this massive tattoo of a butterfly that she has on her vagina!!!! CRAZY!!! Seeing as though Lapa is the Samba heaven in Rio we decide to go out with the Austrian and this crazy American guy (who walks around like a zombie to scare off Robbers hahaha). We are just about to walk into a club round the corner from our hostel when the Columbians appear. They try and teach us to Samba. It is hilarious. We just don´t have the inbuilt rhythms that they do!!! We leave the club and go up to our dorm and heaven forbids, one of The Columbians bursts into the room looking for Tegan and dives on our bed!!! Tegan takes him by the shirt and says álright times up buddy, you have to leave´!!! hahahaha....

So at the conclusion of our Rio adventure, we have not seen JC because his bloody head was in the clouds and we end up at the airport looking like Kath & Kim. How very unusual....

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